Will I ever find time to meditate?
Will you ever find time to meditate? I’m going to say that the across-the-board answer to this is NO.
You have a super busy life, and things keep coming up. The dog needs walking. The kids need you, they’re not feeling so great today. Your life partner has to do their thing and can’t help out. You’re tired and if there is more time, you need to sleep in or take a nap or veg out. Your to-do list is unrelenting. Guests are coming into town and you need to prep the house. There are some big events coming up and you need to prepare for that. You’re dealing with your aging parents. You have to clean out the garage. And you’ve got a few important deadlines to meet.
We have 24 hours in a day, and we get to allocate time to anything we want. The above list seems to get fit in. They make us feel like we’re getting things done, and people notice those. Understandably, they’re just more tangible. Our personal “luxuries,” like meditation, and writing even (for the aspiring writers) go unacknowledged by others (it’s not something we boast about, and there’s no external force making us feel bad if we don’t), and we feel a bit selfish, antsy, or wrong setting time for it when there is so much to do and when we can’t sit still anyway because our mind is racing to get things done or feel useful.
And, we’re not sure that we really want to meditate. It’s more that we feel like we should.
Funnily, your to-dos require more than the ten minutes a day that it takes to meditate, and meditation gives back so much more in those 10 minutes. Meditation can help you get off the to-do loop that has you feeling like when’s it my turn?? It can make you much more authentically productive and purposeful. What’s more, the people around you will begin to notice a je ne sais quoi about you that they can’t put their finger on. You might hear something like, something’s different. What is it? Or, I want what you have. And they won’t be referring to the car you’re driving.
You won’t find the time, but you can MAKE the time. In fact, it’s the first thing I have my clients put on their calendar before anything else. There’s a big difference between finding and making time. One is passive, and the other is intentional. One leaves things to chance, and the other is creative. One puts everything else first, and the other puts you first. One is disempowering, and the other is empowering. The latter results in a remarkable difference in every part of your life experience, including the expansion of your frontal lobe and brain function.
Yes, it can be boring.
We need to take back the attention span, clarity of consciousness, and mental endurance that the news and social media robs from us. We give media WAY more than 10 minutes a day without blinking an eye. Crazy, right?
Yes, it can be hard.
So is achieving success at work, relationships, raising children, and staying healthy. All good things require ongoing intention and attention. They are not once-and-done. It’s like working out - the more regular you are, the easier it gets to access your strengths and overcome your weaknesses.
Yes, it’s daily (ideally).
Just like brushing your teeth, going to the bathroom, getting enough sleep, and taking out the garbage. Things get really gross, and bad, when you don’t do these things.
It’s just 10 minutes. Make the time.
You’ll develop inner grit, and you’ll learn how you rock n roll as you pay attention to your reactivity and your body’s messages during meditation, especially if you do it first thing in the morning when you’d rather be sleeping a little longer; you’ll learn a lot about yourself when you get curious around your narratives.
Just put it in your schedule, first thing in the morning, the time of day where there is less distraction than any other time of day. Another option is just before bed. And yet another option is between 4 to 6 pm: those witching hours when we’re more likely to reach for “happy hour” consumables. When at some point you get super ambitious about this, slip meditation in during all of these times. Ten min a day, 3 times a day. A half hour total? Easy.
Final note: pay attention to the words you use around making time, whether you’re talking about meditation or anything else you want to do for yourself: are you trying to add meditation to your day? Because if you’re trying, you’ve already made it harder to succeed. If you say, I’m doing this, that’s an entirely different energy put behind it. Some people say that the latter sets them up for failure because it isn’t “realistic.” Realistically speaking, trying almost guarantees failure.
As the wise Yoda said, Do or do not. There is no try.
Love, Savitree